The Burden Of 'Magic'

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The Burden Of 'Magic'
Date of Scene: 21 October 2012
Location: French Countryside
Synopsis: Mercade finds Riku, who is thinking about the events that occurred earlier in the evening (Scene #100). Discussions of what happened then brings up the dangers of magic. Riku decides to give Mercade an example, by giving him a taste of his 'gift'. Lessons are learned.
Cast of Characters: Riku, Mercade Alexander

Riku has posed:
Riku sits up against a tree at the edge of a calm lake shrouded in a somewhat eerie mist, his clothes having changed to match the gloomy surroundings that promise rain in the future. Diablo sits calm and quiet in the trees above, sleeping with his head tucked under one wing while a wolf howls somewhere in the near distance. Riku has his journal out and open in his lap, shading in the sketched landscape in quick, rhythmic strokes.

The repetitive act is soothing and he looks up from the journal frequently, staring into the middle distance with a frown before going back to his drawing. He takes in a deep breath of the cold air and closes his eyes. With no people around, the darkness behind his closed eyes is compete and seamless. Manhattan is just-- still too much noise, too much light..

He'd have to practice more. Every time he blew up like that.. it was just driving home Maleficient's words even more. He had to learn to control himself, or bad things were going to happen... or at least.. worse things.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Some time alone is good.

Too much time alone, and... Well, let's just say that Mercade is either really lucky, or really good at tracking people.

Maybe a little of both.

Riku can hear the steps coming. It's not hard to see who it is. Riku might even be able to find out with a minor application of his abilities without even opening his eyes.

Mercade sits down at the same tree Riku does, on the opposite side, with his back to the tree. He looks up, the misty air fading what sun there is in the sky to a featureless gray.

He lets it hang there in the air for a short time, before he finally says, "Riku. I'm sorry about what happened back there."
Riku has posed:
Riku thinks about displacing himself somewhere. Anywhere. Even if it dumped him out over a lake of lava or down the side of a mountain. He begins to draw the magic together and then stops. He pauses, on that knife edge for awhile, and then lets it go, going back to shading his picture. Diablo opens an eye to look down at Mercade, then closes it again and digs deeper into his feathers.

"How do you put up with that? With the not knowing?" Riku sighs his frustration through grit teeth but only ashes remain of his previous flare of spiteful anger. "How could you just take it all in? I've been traveling the worlds for a month and I can't even-- number, the amount of things I've seen that just refuse to make sense to me, an islander without an island."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"I know how you feel, because I feel the same way. I'm... I'm sort of getting numb to all of this. I don't understand any of it, probably even less than you do, because I don't 'get' magic. I don't understand these places, these bridges between worlds. These new peoples and places with all of their strange things they do. The foods. The animals. God! The animals!"

Mercade sighs. "I've gotten to the point where all I can do is sort of try to grapple with what I can understand and just accept the rest for what it is. If people aren't hurt or dying, I just have to put it on the stack of things to deal with later, when I know more."

Mercade gestures up towards Dee, knowing he probably isn't seen, but doing it anyway. "That's why I just sort of checked to see if everyone was okay and moved on back there. I couldn't... understand it. And I knew I wouldn't be able to. All I can do is accept it and move on for some reason because if I didn't... I would fall apart, and get buried under every little detail. I WANT to know. I want to find out why these things happen, and why things go the way they do, but... how could I possibly learn? As it is, I have my hands and head full with the things I AM trying to process."
Riku has posed:
Riku sits with his head up against the tree staring into the distance for a long few minutes of silence. The words just seem to fall into the silence, one after another. He looks down at the journal and twitches with the impulse to wing it into a lake. Diablo gives a grumpy squawk, Riku's hand relaxing from the act of throwing. He takes up the pencil and continues to sketch. "I don't get magic either.." he pauses, then continues.

"I wasn't born with it. My-- my home didn't have it. I--" and whatever words he was going to say trail away to more silence, then the beginnings of anger again. "He's going to hurt someone and he doesn't care. Hell. Probably be himself. The guy practically leaks magic, or-- something. I don't know what it is. -- and while you're trying to process and wait for the world to allow you to catch up, I keep wondering if today is that day. You keep saying you want to help people but whose going to help you when that day comes?"
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade is quiet for a little bit, thinking about it. "My friends, I hope. People like you, and Will, and Deidra. I can't /do/ this alone. I don't know everything about Will, no... But I believe in him, just like I believe in you."

Mercade sighs at that. "Yeah, it sounded kind of schlocky, but that's what it is."
Riku has posed:
Riku groans. "Don't worry." he snorts. "I've developed a somewhat high tolerance to schlock over the years from knowing Sora." he pauses, then adds. "..but maybe I didn't know him as well as I thought." he pulls himself to his feet, walking around the tree to face Mercade.

"But you can't trust magic. You can't /believe/ in it, and hope everything will turn out okay-- because magic always asks for a price. Even if you didn't ask for it. Even if you never wanted to pay it. You pay-- or someone else does."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"Hahah... Sora's like that too, huh?" Mercade thinks for a minute. "You sound like you're speaking from experience." he says, looking up at Riku as he steps around the tree. He looks up and watches Riku's face. "You're right. I know you're right. But I don't understand his magic. He keeps talking about fate and strings and connections and stuff, but past that I don't know the... meaning of it all. How could I learn and understand it?"
Riku has posed:
"Are you really that desperate to understand?" Riku appears to be concentrating very hard on keeping his expression calm and netural. It isn't working entirely, microticks of frustration and something very much like doubt or fear occasionally passing through the cracks of his self control as he talks.

"You can't. No more than I could before my world was destroyed. Value the not knowing a little more, Mercade-- because the only way you're going to understand is for you to find magic of your own.. and i wouldn't wish that on anybody."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade watches Riku, considering his words, his appearance. "I see. I'm sorry. I keep... I guess I keep making your life more complicated, don't I? I wish I could help you, somehow." He looks down, grabbing at the grass beside him. It bends. the damp, tiny fibers caught between his fingers. "I feel like I'm getting caught in an untenable situation, Riku. Is it always like this for you?"
Riku has posed:
CRACK. Riku's composure snaps along a lateral stress point and he just starts to laugh. He leans against the tree just laughing, leaning his head sideways against it with one hand to steady him. He rubs his eyes, continuing to snicker as he gets out. "Yes." he nods to Mercade, letting himself fall into a sitting position.

"Yes it is. This is my life now." he chuckles. "And-- and I can adapt.. or I can go crazy. I'm not sure which would be the better answer right now." he nods sagely. "I think maybe go crazy-- but you. I hope the numb thing works out for you. It doesn't.. LOOK like it does, but what do I know."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade blinks at Riku. He's not sure if laughing is a good thing or bad. "Hah. You know more than I do, but we both know nothing works. I'm just piling on a bigger and bigger wad of stuff that makes no sense and getting rid of it really slowly. Did you know there's a huge snake in a swamp on the way to Goug the size of a house that shoots nuclear fire? I didn't!" He knocks his head against the tree, looking back up to what little of the sky is visible above. "Angels and demons. Wonders and terrors to behold. People say it would be great to live in a place where you see these fantastic creatures and see these miracles, but I don't think they really think about how many of them can kill you. And most of these things don't even care." He sighs.

"Look, Riku. I can't presume to understand what you're going through. But we're here for you, okay? If you need something, just ask."
Riku has posed:
Riku stops laughing as though a switch had been flipped. "Uugh. I wish you people would stop saying that." but there's no venom to the snarled remark. He digs his hands into his hair, muttering. "Yes. I know." when Diablo squawks at him. Squawk. "That too. Give me a break, Dee." The grumpy raven makes a 'hmmph' noise and goes back to sleep. He thumps a fist lightly into the turf.

"Look I can't help you, Mercade. Not while the walking magic bomb still has your wallet. I just-- he freaks me out for SO many reasons." he shakes his head, and falls quiet, blinking several times as if thinking through something. "But-- maybe something else." Diablo opens an eye and stares down at Riku as he continues. "You can't understand, but you want to. " he seems to have difficulty piecing this thought together in his head, and turns to look at Mercade speculatively. ".. what if I could show you, then you'd understand why I don't trust magic.. and I'd answer that question for you. One less for the pile."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"You know we're going to keep saying it. You'll have to work a lot harder than that to make us stop caring about you, man." Mercade points out amusedly. "Anyway, he's got my wallet, but not my money." Mercade says. "I keep most of it in my socks. Used to keep it in my hat, but, well." Mercade gestures. "I let him steal my wallet and pretend he's doing something sneaky. It makes him happy and it gives him a weekly allowance."

He looks up at Diablo. "What is he saying to you? Do you understand him?" He back down to Riku. "You want to show me? What do you want to show?" He can't resist. His curiosity is a lethal trait, sometimes.
Riku has posed:
Riku chuckles. "It's magic." with a very dry inflection and the appropriate finger wiggling. "Believe me, most of the time it's better to believe I /don't/ hear him." Diablo grumbles that low lawnmower sound of frustrated annoyance. He takes a breath, and then lets it out slowly.

"I never knew magic could be stored in something or moved from place to place until yesterday. I just thought-- well. That everybody figures it out on their own, and then pretends that is completely normal." he snorts. "So. I think.. I can give you a fragment of what I have. Then I will take it back, and-- you've been friends with Will for a long time, haven't you?"
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade thinks back for a bit. "Well, yeah. I've known him for a good while." Mercade says. "I'm used to him. He's a quirky guy, but I guess he's sort of got that irrepressable... carefree nature, really. I've never really seen him take anything seriously before. Why do you ask?" Mercade stands up, his curiosity piqued. "Are you saying you could give me some of your magic?" He asks. "But what does Will have to do with it? Besides explosions, apparently."
Riku has posed:
"No idea." Riku shakes his head, shrugging. "Will grabbed Dee who was trying to snatch his pizza away from him. Not a smart move, by the way for either of them. Dee bit down on his hand and-- explosion."

Riku starts to push himself to his feet again as well. "Because I know the type, Mercade. It's funny, but I keep seeing it. Over and over. You know what they have in common? They keep anything that hurts them to themselves. And then-- sometimes the cheerful doesn't go all the way down to the bottom, and those empty places are perfect for rot to set it, and nobody will know because hey.. he's just a quirky, carefree guy."
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"All this caused from a fight over pizza. The craziest things..." Mercade sighs, crossing his arms. "So you think he might have some kind of problem, and he's hiding it from everyone?" Mercade asks. "Or maybe he's actually deceiving us intentionally about something?"
Riku has posed:
Riku shakes his head. "No. Or at least-- if he's hiding something, it's probably something he's hiding from everybody, including himself." he crosses his arms, leaning against the tree. "--But he's not interested in answers like you are. There are so many questions, and not only is he not overloaded, but he doesn't seem to care. How can you trust someone who may go off like that at any moment, and he doesn't want to know why?"
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"Maybe that's how he copes with it. By not caring." Mercade replies. "Weird stuff happens? Who cares?" Mercade considers. "Or maybe he thinks, somehow, that maybe the answer might be worse than not knowing."
Riku has posed:
"Maybe it is.." Riku shakes his head very slowly, shifting from foot to foot. "And.. maybe I can't do anything for you except not pick fights. " he pauses, suddenly doubtful as he rubs the back of his head. "Are you sure you want to know this? I mean. Maybe he's right." He can't deny that he's curious, but is that really worth risking another potential moment of explosion? He'd had enough of those for one evening.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade Alexander is a perfectly normal guy. He thinks. "You've been a lot of help, Riku. Don't say that. You're trying to find things to help in your own way. There's nothing wrong with that." Mercade looks down at the ground, considering. "Maybe he is right... But there's a big difference between him and me."

Mercade's eyes narrow for a moment. "I can't save anyone if I don't know how. If I blow up, well... Hopefully I survive. I won't hold you responsible."
Riku has posed:
"And thankfully, portal magic gets rid of all the stains if you do explode." Riku smirks, but it's a fragile expression. He chuckles quietly and rolls his shoulders. It seemed so easy to do before. This was simply.. the same thing, only backwards. Well-- not exactly the same thing. There was--

No.
Focus.

Riku takes a few deep breaths, steadying himself and closing his eyes. The smear of light across his vision was what he was looking for more than anything else. He puts out a hand to touch Mercade's shoulder. Diablo squawks. "Yeah? Then you come down and help." Squawk. "Pft. I thought so." Riku shakes his head in chagrin and tries to run it back and forth in his mind. Every time the magic worked, he just-- did it.

He didn't think about it other than 'This is what I want, give me it' even if he hadn't really known that was what he was doing. So he demanded. And-- nothing happened. Until he asked again, and pushed harder. Something gave, as if he'd uncorked a bottle from the inside and everything was flowing out because the bottle had been tipped over on it's side. Riku gasped, knees buckling as at this point in the transition he has to figure out just how to get it to stop before all of it, and his consciousneness, maybe even his life.. drained away with it.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade isn't really able to give Riku a hand for the moment.

This is because he suddenly has his own problems. The energy surges into him, blackflame rushing and pooling around him. His eyes widen as he collapses to his knees. Through that connection, as draining as it is, Riku gains insight.

A fallen child with familiar messy hair, crying. A hand reaching out to them from above. Wiping away their tears.

A dozen voices, crying out and jeering. Again, that child, beaten and crying. This time, that hand was not there to lift them up.

A stolen ball. Torn homework. Parents, yelling at each other.

A child, a different one, surrounded by taunting and jeering bullies. He is pushed around, unable to do anything about it until the black-hared child charges into the middle of them, scattering them by surprise. He pulls the other child away, holding out a hand to pull him up and get to safety. A friendship is forged there, one that would last years.

An empty place at the table. The mother could not answer her son's questions. She shook her head, smiling, and told him that she would tell him when he was older.

The friend, accused of stealing from another classmate. The black-haired child exonerates him by finding out that another child had committed the crime.

"I want to stop this from happening to people."

The break of fortune causes the black-haired child to choose his path. Books become a major part of his life, as well as learning about his surroundings. He grows from young sleuths to the classic stories, using this steady diet to fuel his passion.

The child is older, a man. His mother still cannot say why there was an empty place at the table.

"Even if you cannot tell me, I will find the answer."

"I want to help people. I want to protect them. I want to find the truth."

You can have it.

Newspapers. Corruption in lurid print and on the television. Murder. Lives destroyed not by horrible beasts but by more familiar terrors.

Justice is in your hands. The truth is in your grasp.

A small, dingy apartment, barely able to be called an office. A woman in white, far classier than her surroundings. Her breath smelled like cigarettes and whiskey. Her perfume was of lilacs and trouble.

You will be the bastion they need. You will protect them. Save them. And they will love you.

In reality, Mercade's lips move, quietly saying a few simple words. "the power..."

Back in the welter of thoughts, a man is devoured by the heartless, a gleaming heart rising into the air and pierced by black thorns. A thousand-thousand golden eyes open, turning towards the screaming black-haired man in the doorway.

You will never fear again. You will be justice. You will be the hand of judgement.

Shattering glass
and you
Falling
will be
falling...
a beloved
"...hero..."

And then Mercade screams.
Riku has posed:
The flashback knocks Riku flat as he pulls the magic back to him because it fights back. Suddenly he has the moment of dread in which he has done something, and can't take it back.. but he has to.

No. No you don't.

He could be free of it.

The sound was muffled. The light no longer blinding, as if he looked at the world through a thick sheet. There was silence. He couldn't hear the heartless anymore, the constant chatter of their hunger at the edge of thought. Silence.

Whether Maleficient was lying or not, whether it was magic or shadow or soul, he could push it all on the detective. Sora didn't matter, Kairi didn't matter. The two of them distant dreams of a dead world. Let them save themselves or eachother. For this selfish moment he could disappear and without the darkness Maleficient would never find him, never compel him again. Never manipulate that flicker of doubt.

Didn't he say he wanted it? Didn't he want to be the hero? Let him pay the price for it.

Then Mercade screams. and Riku jerks as if he had been electrocuted. There is a sound like shattering glass and he instinctively pulls back, pulls it all back into himself, pulls away from Mercade.

There is a flicker of regret, and then Riku falls backwards as if he'd been struck in the chest by a hammer. Diablo flutters down to land on his chest. The raven turns to look up at the detective. The look he gives Mercade is considering, almost.. interested. Approving. Riku groans faintly but seems somewhat out of it for the moment.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
And it all is drawn away, pulled back out of him. Mercade's wide eyes roll into the back of his head and he sighs, collapsing forward like a puppet with his strings cut. He lies there for a moment, breathing and letting his racing heart return to some semblance of normality. He doesn't see the appraising look on Diablo's face, but in time he flops over, propping himself up against a tree. "God." His voice is hoarse, obviously so since he had just been screaming like his soul was being torn out.

Maybe it was.

He looks over at Riku, still not really registering Diablo's avian malevolence. "Riku." He croaks. "Are you okay?"
Riku has posed:
"With the questions again.." Riku whispers, throwing an arm over his eyes. Diablo flutters onto the ground, tenatively poking him as he turns over to press his face into the ground. The raven looks worried for a moment, then covers that up by letting out an annoyed squawk and flying back to his perch in the trees above.

"Let's not do that again. Ow." Riku mumbles from around a mouthful of leaf litter. "You..?" obviously inquiring, but not even having the strength to formulate the rest of the sentence.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"Bad habit." Mercade replies. "I'm fine. I think. Agreed, never doing that again."

He groans, and then he twists behind the tree, depositing the last couple slices of pizza onto the forest floor. Don't worry, he missed the sketchbook.
Riku has posed:
Riku says, "This..I think.. ends the lesson." Riku rolls onto his back, wincing at the sound of Mercade tossing his pizza. He keeps an arm over his eyes for another minute before starting to push himself onto his feet.""
Mercade Alexander has posed:
"Had more than enough." Mercade grunts. He uses the tree as an aid to stand again, though he remains leaning against it. "Your life is hell."
Riku has posed:
"Well." Riku chuckles quietly. He gathers up the sketchbook and Diablo, gesturing for the raven to come down, which complies after a moment or two. "Just remember if you go looking for keyblades, or frogs, or princesses, or the heartless.. to check the price tag first. Hopefully, you'll get an chance to refuse." RIku pulls the hood over his face, drawing the cloak around him as he walks away from Mercade into the surrounding forest.
Mercade Alexander has posed:
Mercade isn't so out of it that he doesn't read the undertone in those words.

'Because I didn't.'

Mercade turns, not following Riku anymore. They've come to an understanding, as much as he could hope for one. He's going to go home.

Provided he doesn't get eaten by wolves on the way. That's a thing that apparently happens sometimes.